You see, Iceland is one of the most geneticially pure countries in the world.

I mean, heck, how many Icelandic immigrants have you met? A country of 300,000, I decided to do some research of my own and sure enough, I found stories that supported the outrageous claims of my coworker.

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All parties come to an end, however, leaving me and many others of my generation with no partner we love or otherwise happy ending that you see in Pedowood movies, because dating was never designed to help you find life-long partners.

It’s a dead-end that explains why so many Western adults in their 30’s have never had a committed monogamous relationship of even a year in length.

It was never intended as a way for heterosexuals to find long-term partners, and any culture that has implemented it has suffered both lowered marriage and birth rates.

Dating is merely a technique for gaining sex, not relationships.

Before you have a hearty chuckle, let me tell you of the ramblings of one of my coworkers.

Skeptically, I listened to him as he told me of untold riches in the form of Nordic, blonde hair, blue-eyed, curvaceous girls in a region that is ill-named.

If dating was an experimental drug intended to treat cancer, the experiment would stop halfway through because of how disastrous it is on the patient.

Randomly opening a phone book and marrying the first opposite sex name you come across would have the same success rate, assuming there is mutual physical attraction.

No other tactic has a greater failure rate in creating stable marriages and families than Western-style dating, a method that only excels in finding short-term sexual partners.

Before writing off dating completely, we have to first define what a relationship success story looks like.

Ok, ok, so I haven't been there, nor do I condone such blasphemous behavior as female exploitation - but I feel it is my duty as the 'Silicon Valley Bachelor' to inform you of places to 'attract the interest' of the opposite sex.